{"id":4369,"date":"2018-10-06T07:58:29","date_gmt":"2018-10-06T05:58:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/?p=4369"},"modified":"2018-10-06T07:58:36","modified_gmt":"2018-10-06T05:58:36","slug":"le-chronophage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/index.php\/2018\/10\/06\/le-chronophage\/","title":{"rendered":"Le chronophage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1200\" height=\"652\" src=\"https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-4372\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge.jpg 1200w, https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge-300x163.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge-768x417.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge-1024x556.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/horloge-500x272.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Un ver solitaire invisible se terre dans ma demeure.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Il se manifeste le plus souvent lorsque le rez de chauss\u00e9e baigne dans des ondes fluctuantes. Tout d\u2019abord ce n\u2019est qu\u2019un spectre vert qui scintille au niveau du sol, non loin de la prise ADSL, comme une luciole. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>La cr\u00e9ature silencieuse reste tapie \u00e0 patienter dans le noir, attendant son heure, que je ne m\u2019installe dans le salon, sa pi\u00e8ce de pr\u00e9dilection. Je sais qu\u2019il est l\u00e0, aux aguets quand j\u2019allume mon ordinateur et que j\u2019ouvre le navigateur Chrome. Il piaffe, il esp\u00e8re. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>D\u00e8s que j\u2019ouvre Gmail il en profite et se jette avidement sur moi, la gueule b\u00e9ante, me volant quelques minutes de vie, l\u2019air de rien. Quand je r\u00e9alise ce qu\u2019il a fait, il est trop tard, il s\u2019est cach\u00e9, attendant dans l\u2019ombre une nouvelle occasion. Elle ne tarde d\u2019ailleurs pas, lorsque plong\u00e9 dans la lecture des actualit\u00e9s de Facebook, je me r\u00e9veille hagard, ayant perdu une demie heure de ma vie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mais ce qu\u2019il pr\u00e9f\u00e8re par-dessus tout, c\u2019est lorsque que je d\u00e9-zippe un album de rock progressif et que je lance VLC sur la cha\u00eene. Il peut alors d\u00e9vorer plus de soixante minutes d\u2019un seul coup de m\u00e2choire. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Je ne sais o\u00f9 il se cache, mais d\u00e8s que le Wifi inonde la maison, je le sens pr\u00eat \u00e0 bondir, affam\u00e9. Alors pour sauver le peu de temps qu\u2019il me reste \u00e0 vivre, je coupe la Box le soir. Mais le monstre est plein de ressources, il se gave \u00e9galement d\u2019ondes sonores et lumineuses. Outre la musique, il aime les rayons puissants du vid\u00e9o projecteur. Que je regarde une s\u00e9rie TV ou un film, la b\u00eate, insatiable d\u00e9vore goul\u00fbment mes heures de vie. Et plus elle mange, plus elle a faim. Son enveloppe ectoplasmique translucide regorge des secondes que j\u2019aurai du passer \u00e0 tondre la pelouse, nettoyer la cuisine ou terminer la salle de bain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pour lutter contre ce voleur de temps, j\u2019ai d\u00e9cid\u00e9 pendant les vacances de ne plus allumer Internet et la t\u00e9l\u00e9vision, de ne pas prononcer \u00e0 voix haute le nom de Sardaigne afin qu\u2019il ne se cache pas dans nos bagages, afin de disposer de quelques instants pour lire, me promener, profiter du temps qui passe lentement, regarder les nuages bouger dans le ciel, les vagues moutonner sur la mer et le vent souffler dans les branches.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>H\u00e9las, \u00e0 peine revenu \u00e0 la maison, le chronophage affam\u00e9 s\u2019est jet\u00e9 sur moi, plus avide de temps que jamais, se d\u00e9lectant du courrier et des messages en retard.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Au moment o\u00f9 j\u2019\u00e9cris ces mots, je d\u00e9couvre avec horreur qu\u2019il m\u2019a encore d\u00e9rob\u00e9 quinze nouvelles minutes de mon existence, pourtant Internet est coup\u00e9 et je ne regarde pas de film. Elle m\u2019attaque presque tout le temps maintenant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Prenez garde, la b\u00eate est sournoise et se reproduit vite. Coupez votre Box, \u00e9teignez votre\u00a0 smartphone, n\u2019allumez pas la t\u00e9l\u00e9vision, installez-vous avec un livre, une bi\u00e8re et m\u00e9ditez sur le temps qui passe. Laissez l\u2019ennui venir, c\u2019est son pire ennemi, le seul capable de vous rendre quelques pr\u00e9cieuses secondes de vie.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>La cr\u00e9ature silencieuse reste tapie \u00e0 patienter dans le noir, attendant son heure, que je ne m\u2019installe dans le salon, sa pi\u00e8ce de pr\u00e9dilection. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/index.php\/2018\/10\/06\/le-chronophage\/\">Continuer la lecture <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4372,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"image","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[121,59,34,1,422,449],"tags":[250,826,331],"class_list":["post-4369","post","type-post","status-publish","format-image","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cinema","category-humeur","category-internet","category-non-classe","category-serie-tv","category-vacances","tag-internet","tag-loisirs","tag-temps","post_format-post-format-image"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Le chronophage - Le Blog du N\u00e9oprog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.blog.neoprog.eu\/index.php\/2018\/10\/06\/le-chronophage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Le chronophage - Le Blog du N\u00e9oprog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"La cr\u00e9ature silencieuse reste tapie \u00e0 patienter dans le noir, attendant son heure, que je ne m\u2019installe dans le salon, sa pi\u00e8ce de pr\u00e9dilection. 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